What. A. Ride...

Well...it's been a long time...sorry for that. Life took over and I haven't had much time to blog. But since I know my readers have lives, too, and (contrary to what I'd like to believe) do not wait with baited breath for my next tid-bits of wisdom (ha!), I'll keep it as short as I can! :-)

Obviously, I had the baby. Andrew Leon was born on April 13, 2011, weighing in at 7 lbs 6.2 oz. His middle name is my uncle's name (the one I blogged about) who passed on April 1, 2011. Losing Leon was very difficult. He wasn't just an Uncle, he was a close friend, a prayer warrior, and someone who was ALWAYS in my corner. I still find myself wanting to call him when I see/hear the kids do/say something funny/cute. Even now, it can be excruciating when I automatically go to pick up the phone and call him (as I did for so many years) to tell him what was going on with me or the kids. I thought it was just me, but I've spoken with other family members who feel the same way. We're learning to live without him, day by day, and it's getting easier to remember the good things.

Our middle son, Nathan, was finally approved for Special education services, due to some cognitive delays, speech delays, and developmental delays. Basically, he acts as though he's 2 or 3 years old, and he's 5 years old. We had him enrolled in a regular preschool, the same one we sent Jack to, and they kept recommending we get him tested. He did really well in the SPED preschool, but will still need SPED services all day in Kindergarten. He talks, but is still difficult to understand, he still has a very short attention span, he still has a hard time expressing his feelings of frustration without throwing tantrums, BUT, he barely spoke when he started SPED, now he uses his words most of the time, he preferred to play alone and didn't play well with others, now he wants to play with other children, and can very often play nicely. Sharing can be a challenge. :-) He also got glasses and LOVES the attention he gets when he wears them. He's such a ham!

Our oldest son, Jack (John Jr., officially, but I didn't want one of them cowering in fear when I really meant to yell at the other!), was diagnosed with ADHD, got glasses for astigmatism, and after a very difficult school year with a very nit-picky, inflexible teacher (READ: READY TO RETIRE), we finally got him approved for Special Education Services. I really wasn't happy about it at first. The first day he was going to have SPED, I dropped him off at school feeling like I had failed him as a Mother, and had taken the "easy way out." When I picked him up in the afternoon, HE WAS SMILING!!!! I hadn't seen him smile at the end of the school day in MONTHS! From there on out, I didn't question if the services were necessary. They were necessary, if for no other reason than to get him the heck out of the negative environment he was in (with Mrs. Battle Axe...) so he could learn and flourish without the constant criticism and unreasonable expectations. Doing homework with him was no longer a nightmare, bad reports home from the teacher were few and far between, and he didn't try to fake sick when it was time for school. Hallelujah! Problem Solved!! Until this Summer...(dun, dun, duuuuuuuuuunnnnn...) last Monday (July 13th), I decided to take him in to the Dr. because he had been wetting the bed in ridiculous quantities (soaking through a "GoodNight", and still leaving one of the Great Lakes in the middle of the bed), drinking copious amounts of any liquids he could get his hands on, and going to the bathroom frequently, but still having accidents. I thought he probably had a urinary tract infection (I knew the signs for Diabetes in children, but thought i was just overreacting and being a pessimist like I usually am), so I took him in. They tested his urine, and he was spilling glucose and ketones into it. His Dr. said that given our family history of diabetes, and the high levels of glucose and ketones in his urine (there aren't supposed to be ANY of EITHER), there really wasn't another explanation, and gave me a referral to an endocrinologist (who couldn't see my son for 2 MONTHS.). The next morning he called and said to bring him in for some blood tests, because he felt that he needed to be admitted. We got him admitted on Tuesday, late afternoon, and were there until Friday afternoon. There is still so much to learn about my son's condition (type 1 diabetes), but I feel like we're getting it under control. He is his normal self again, and is getting used to the finger pokes and insulin injections. Man, was it rough going in the beginning! He would scream and cry and struggle...at one point he went running out of his hospital room and down the hall to avoid a shot! It was the first shot I gave him, I think. Once I finished the injection, I went out into the hallway, had a 5 minute bawl my eyes out session, then went back to my child. It's still hard, but I don't feel like dying would be easier anymore. I no longer dissolve into a puddle of tears and snot whenever i talk about it. I know it could have been so much worse. Kids who present with type 1 diabetes usually end up in the ER because they can't control the vomiting, or they are unconscious, sometimes in a coma! None of that happened to Jack, and I am so thankful that God pressed on my memory the signs and symptoms of diabetes before it was too late. I'm so grateful to him for family (on both sides) who took the time to call and share their experiences with and knowledge of this disease with my husband and I (Amber, Aunt Debbie, Maureen...you will be blessed!)! I think w/o talking to you guys this past week, we would have been lost. God is good, all the time!

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. -James 1:12 NIV-

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. -Romans 5:3-4 NIV-

Until Next Time...

In His Love,

Clairessa Mack